Below is a blog post entry from 2012. Not much has changed - except Jessica no longer has an invisible friend/cat named Anga - instead she loves Invader Zim, Powerpuff Girls, music, dancing (especially doing the nae-nae), and talking about voice actors and cartoonists. I definitely still love her with all my heart, and embrace her uniqueness (and BOY is she unique!). Enjoy :-)
A letter to my daughter Jessica, on World Autism Day:
Dear Jessica,
When you were born, I was most excited about your blue eyes. Your father and I both have brown eyes, and everyone told me the color would fade from the sparkly blue to a darker brown. I knew better. I sensed that you would have blue eyes. Having blue eyes meant an awful lot to me back then. Maybe I thought children with blue eyes were treated better, or that because of your eye color things would come easier to you. Whatever ridiculous notion I had about your blueberry eyes, was just that; ridiculous.
Autism strikes no matter what color your eyes are.
Jessica, you have autism. I don’t think I have ever spoken that sentence to you. As a mother, it is hard to speak about labels and disabilities to your child. But know this, you may have autism but autism certainly does not have you. It just makes some things harder for you. Playing with friends, or going to school is hard for you because of autism. Loud noises and transitions are hard for you because of your autism. But autism has also given you so many wonderful traits. You are a talented artist. You would draw all day, every day if you could. You know more about cats than I could ever hope to learn. Because of you, I know that the Turkish Van is a cat that likes to swim. That is one cool thing to know! Thank you for that tidbit. Autism gives you that enormous and creative imagination. You are the most imaginative person I know. You have introduced us to your gang of imaginary cats, headed by Anga. Anga is pretty awesome. She used to work at Subway, and she is British? How cool is that??
This might sound a little odd, but I would like to thank autism for giving me such a wonderful daughter. I couldn’t imagine you any other way. You are a blessing to every life you touch.
Thanks autism, for my blueberry-eyed, creative, magical, loving, and silly Jessica. If you didn’t give me the beautiful parts of Jessica, I would never be able to laugh through the hard days.
Love,
Mommy
Showing posts with label Jessica. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Jessica. Show all posts
Thursday, April 2, 2015
Sunday, October 20, 2013
Jessica and 5th Grade
It has been a while since I have blogged! I have been extremely busy with work, a fantastic Fellowship opportunity, and of course - my family.
Jessica is in 5th grade. Jessica is in 5th grade - I have to type it twice because I can hardly believe it. She has grown and matured so much in the past 2 years. If you had told me in 3rd grade that she would be where she is today academically and socially, I would have thought you were crazy! In fact, she has made so much progress academically that IEP goals written in April had to be rewritten in September because she achieved most of them!
For me, the last 2 years have been learning about the environment Jessica learns best in. Although she needs the safety of a substantially separate classroom, she also thrives during the times she is in the typical 5th grade classroom. Her aide and special education teacher have done an extraordinary job of finding this balance for Jessica, while giving her the opportunity to be a "regular" kid. We are blessed to have a team that truly cares for Jessica, and wants the best for her.
Jessica has also really broadened her opportunity for social interactions. She attends a social skills group once a week, as well as going to our local Youth Center on Saturdays to "hang out". She has also expressed an interest in joining the Booster Club wrestling team. Yes, I said wrestling. We were driving away from school one afternoon, and she saw a sign for wrestling sign ups. Out of the blue, she told me she wanted to wrestle. She told me she wanted to do it because "I am strong, and it will be fun!". SERIOUSLY?? I have been trying to get her involved in sports since she was 4 years old, but have never been successful in my endeavors. It goes back to what I wrote in the spring - if you are upset because your ASD child is not involved in community activities - don't be. Once you/they are able to identify preferred activities, it is smooth sailing (well as smooth as having a child with an ASD diagnosis is!). Autism is all about preferred activities!
Jessica after getting the much anticipated Pokémon X & Y DS game!
Jessica is in 5th grade. Jessica is in 5th grade - I have to type it twice because I can hardly believe it. She has grown and matured so much in the past 2 years. If you had told me in 3rd grade that she would be where she is today academically and socially, I would have thought you were crazy! In fact, she has made so much progress academically that IEP goals written in April had to be rewritten in September because she achieved most of them!
For me, the last 2 years have been learning about the environment Jessica learns best in. Although she needs the safety of a substantially separate classroom, she also thrives during the times she is in the typical 5th grade classroom. Her aide and special education teacher have done an extraordinary job of finding this balance for Jessica, while giving her the opportunity to be a "regular" kid. We are blessed to have a team that truly cares for Jessica, and wants the best for her.
Jessica has also really broadened her opportunity for social interactions. She attends a social skills group once a week, as well as going to our local Youth Center on Saturdays to "hang out". She has also expressed an interest in joining the Booster Club wrestling team. Yes, I said wrestling. We were driving away from school one afternoon, and she saw a sign for wrestling sign ups. Out of the blue, she told me she wanted to wrestle. She told me she wanted to do it because "I am strong, and it will be fun!". SERIOUSLY?? I have been trying to get her involved in sports since she was 4 years old, but have never been successful in my endeavors. It goes back to what I wrote in the spring - if you are upset because your ASD child is not involved in community activities - don't be. Once you/they are able to identify preferred activities, it is smooth sailing (well as smooth as having a child with an ASD diagnosis is!). Autism is all about preferred activities!
Jessica after getting the much anticipated Pokémon X & Y DS game!
Sunday, March 20, 2011
Jessica's Birthday
My beautiful baby girl is going to turn 8 in a matter of weeks. I cannot believe my little 3lb 12oz, 34 weeker is going to be another year older.
It feels like this is a big milestone for Jessica and myself. 8 is an age that I can remember from my childhood. Things before that age are a little blurry. Of course I can remember things here and there, but it seems as if 8 is when a child starts forming memories that stay with them for life.
Jessica will remember the period in time that she had to wear a back brace. She will remember having a 3-D Tuxedo Cat birthday cake. She will remember when I took her away for the night on a girls mini-vacation to a small New Hampshire hotel. Jessica will remember the taste of cafeteria pizza on Friday afternoons. She will remember playing with her brother at the park down the street, and how it felt to slide down the twisty slide. Hopefully she will remember all of the good things that come with being 8.
Happy Almost-Birthday Jessica! I love you :-)
It feels like this is a big milestone for Jessica and myself. 8 is an age that I can remember from my childhood. Things before that age are a little blurry. Of course I can remember things here and there, but it seems as if 8 is when a child starts forming memories that stay with them for life.
Jessica will remember the period in time that she had to wear a back brace. She will remember having a 3-D Tuxedo Cat birthday cake. She will remember when I took her away for the night on a girls mini-vacation to a small New Hampshire hotel. Jessica will remember the taste of cafeteria pizza on Friday afternoons. She will remember playing with her brother at the park down the street, and how it felt to slide down the twisty slide. Hopefully she will remember all of the good things that come with being 8.
Happy Almost-Birthday Jessica! I love you :-)
Friday, March 18, 2011
Worst Mother in the World
Do any of you have children on the spectrum that frequently complain about sickness because they don't know how else to communicate?
It started when Jessica was learning to speak at about 3 years old. She would complain that she was "itchy" when she was stressed or had a sensory overload.
It slowly moved into other things such as "My hip hurts." "My legs are wobbly." "I have a fever." "I have the strep (strep throat)". "My stomach hurts." "My back hurts."
WELL.......after 4 months or so of Jessica complaining about her back, I noticed that she wasn't always complaining of back pain when things were getting out of control for her. I decided to take her to the pediatrician, and she suggested that we take Jessica to a back specialist to get some xrays.
Fast forward to a week ago: Jessica has spondylolothis
It is a common stress fracture for growing kids. Apparently Jessica had all the symptoms: back pain, tight hamstrings, and a forward leaning posture.
She now has to wear a back brace, that looks super uncomfortable. Although she LOVES the tight t-shirt she has to wear under the brace. Upside!
It's official. I am the worst mother in the world. My kid has a stress fracture, and I didn't do anything about it for a while. I really dislike Autism. Because if not for Autism, I would have take her to the doctor right away.
I do feel a little better about being the worst mother in the world because her teachers admitted to being the worst teachers in the world because they overlooked her complaints as well.
How do you decide when a complaint from a child on the spectrum is real, and when it is just a coping mechanism??
It started when Jessica was learning to speak at about 3 years old. She would complain that she was "itchy" when she was stressed or had a sensory overload.
It slowly moved into other things such as "My hip hurts." "My legs are wobbly." "I have a fever." "I have the strep (strep throat)". "My stomach hurts." "My back hurts."
WELL.......after 4 months or so of Jessica complaining about her back, I noticed that she wasn't always complaining of back pain when things were getting out of control for her. I decided to take her to the pediatrician, and she suggested that we take Jessica to a back specialist to get some xrays.
Fast forward to a week ago: Jessica has spondylolothis
It is a common stress fracture for growing kids. Apparently Jessica had all the symptoms: back pain, tight hamstrings, and a forward leaning posture.
She now has to wear a back brace, that looks super uncomfortable. Although she LOVES the tight t-shirt she has to wear under the brace. Upside!
It's official. I am the worst mother in the world. My kid has a stress fracture, and I didn't do anything about it for a while. I really dislike Autism. Because if not for Autism, I would have take her to the doctor right away.
I do feel a little better about being the worst mother in the world because her teachers admitted to being the worst teachers in the world because they overlooked her complaints as well.
How do you decide when a complaint from a child on the spectrum is real, and when it is just a coping mechanism??
Thursday, March 3, 2011
Pity; Party of 1
I just came home from a very cute and entertaining talent show. The kids are all from Jessica's school and range from kindergarten to 2nd grade. They did a great job, and were so cute. Jessica's brother Jack came along with me to root on his classmates. He had a blast.
Now here is where the Pity Party starts. About half way through, I started to get very upset. Jessica will never be one of those girls shakin' their groove thangs to a Hannah Montana song. She won't dress up like a puppy and sing "Who Let the Dogs Out".
Jessica didn't even want to go to watch the show, nevermind be in it. Everytime I broached the subject she ran away from me screaming. I am sorry, but this makes me want to cry. I wish for her to be able to enjoy silly things like watching her friends make fools of themselves at a 2nd grade talent show.
If you want to know where I am tonight, I will be at "Ristorante Depressed". My reservation is under "Pity; party of 1"
Now here is where the Pity Party starts. About half way through, I started to get very upset. Jessica will never be one of those girls shakin' their groove thangs to a Hannah Montana song. She won't dress up like a puppy and sing "Who Let the Dogs Out".
Jessica didn't even want to go to watch the show, nevermind be in it. Everytime I broached the subject she ran away from me screaming. I am sorry, but this makes me want to cry. I wish for her to be able to enjoy silly things like watching her friends make fools of themselves at a 2nd grade talent show.
If you want to know where I am tonight, I will be at "Ristorante Depressed". My reservation is under "Pity; party of 1"
Tuesday, March 1, 2011
Jessica and her "Ear Mops"
As I mentioned in an earlier blog, we recently had a wonderful trip to Disney. In planning the trip, I purchased some noise canceling ear phones for Jessica. She can sometimes have issues with loud noise, and I wanted to be prepared and make this trip as perfect as I could. And although she had a couple of meltdowns, she was the best behaved of all 3 of my children
Now that we are home Jessica has taken to wearing the earphones a lot. I think she enjoys the pressure on her ears more than their noise canceling effect. Last night she fell asleep with them on.
I should have known the earphones were going to be a hit because at the beginning of the winter she picked out a lovely pair of Hello Kitty earmuffs. She has a stringent morning routine that includes putting on her Hello Kitty "ear mops" as she calls them, putting on her hat on over the earmuffs, jacket, right glove, left glove, and then her scarf. If something gets in the way of this procedure, it ruins her day. My husband doesn't quite understand this. That is why he is not allowed to help her with this part of the morning!
We drove to Florida, and she wore this get up all the way to South Carolina. I tried to explain to her that it was warm out and she didn't need to be so bundled up. I finally was able to get her to shed her winter clothes when we stopped at South of the Border. The poor kid was a ball of sweat.
I am dreading the change of seasons. If I can get her to lose the hat and gloves it will be a victory!
Now that we are home Jessica has taken to wearing the earphones a lot. I think she enjoys the pressure on her ears more than their noise canceling effect. Last night she fell asleep with them on.
I should have known the earphones were going to be a hit because at the beginning of the winter she picked out a lovely pair of Hello Kitty earmuffs. She has a stringent morning routine that includes putting on her Hello Kitty "ear mops" as she calls them, putting on her hat on over the earmuffs, jacket, right glove, left glove, and then her scarf. If something gets in the way of this procedure, it ruins her day. My husband doesn't quite understand this. That is why he is not allowed to help her with this part of the morning!
We drove to Florida, and she wore this get up all the way to South Carolina. I tried to explain to her that it was warm out and she didn't need to be so bundled up. I finally was able to get her to shed her winter clothes when we stopped at South of the Border. The poor kid was a ball of sweat.
I am dreading the change of seasons. If I can get her to lose the hat and gloves it will be a victory!
Tuesday, February 22, 2011
Jessica and Big Time Rush
Kids are growing up so fast these days. It seems like they are exposed to mature themes on a daily basis.
Jessica recently was watching a popular TV show on Nickelodeon called "Big Time Rush". It is a program about a boy band that moves to LA to hit it big.
As she was watching it, Jessica turned to me and said "They are hot."
I was a little surprised by what she was saying, because I had never heard her talk like that before.
I suspiciously asked replied, "What does that mean?"
She took a minute to think about it, and said "It means they are un-cold."
It's times like these that I am thankful she is clueless!
Jessica recently was watching a popular TV show on Nickelodeon called "Big Time Rush". It is a program about a boy band that moves to LA to hit it big.
As she was watching it, Jessica turned to me and said "They are hot."
I was a little surprised by what she was saying, because I had never heard her talk like that before.
I suspiciously asked replied, "What does that mean?"
She took a minute to think about it, and said "It means they are un-cold."
It's times like these that I am thankful she is clueless!
Monday, February 21, 2011
And so are the felines of our lives.
How is it possible that I have not blogged in almost a year??!!??
Oh, how I have failed my readers. Wait, do I even have any readers?
Jessica is almost a year older, wiser, taller, and cat-ier. Wouldn't you think by now she would be out of her feline phase? Sorry to disappoint you, but she is more feline then ever. She now refers to herself as Jessicat and is obsessed with Tuxedo cats.
We recently took a long awaited (and deserved) trip to Disney World. One afternoon I became worried that there was something wrong with Jessica's hands. She would not open her fingers, and cupped both hands for a long time. It took me all afternoon to figure out that there was nothing wrong with her hands, she just decided she had claws and not hands. Well, DUH!
Here is a video of her at Hollywood Studios trying out for the part of "cat". Enjoy!
Oh, how I have failed my readers. Wait, do I even have any readers?
Jessica is almost a year older, wiser, taller, and cat-ier. Wouldn't you think by now she would be out of her feline phase? Sorry to disappoint you, but she is more feline then ever. She now refers to herself as Jessicat and is obsessed with Tuxedo cats.
We recently took a long awaited (and deserved) trip to Disney World. One afternoon I became worried that there was something wrong with Jessica's hands. She would not open her fingers, and cupped both hands for a long time. It took me all afternoon to figure out that there was nothing wrong with her hands, she just decided she had claws and not hands. Well, DUH!
Here is a video of her at Hollywood Studios trying out for the part of "cat". Enjoy!
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